Panties in a Bundle

           I’m back in Haiti with five days under my belt.  I’ve settled in nicely, but the first night was rough.  

            No, not rough.  Horrible.

            I was picked up on time at the airport. My luggage came in just fine. But, Gertrude, for some reason, forgot that I was staying at Notre Maison right away.  Needless to say, my room wasn’t ready.

            Not only was my room not ready, a bed wasn’t even prepared for me.  I stood in the hallway with my bags while they tore dirty sheets off one bed and put clean one on for me.  Whoever had been sleeping in the room had to relocate, and I felt like an unwanted intruder.

            In just a couple of minutes my room was ready, and I had some privacy.

            I started sobbing.  Gut-wrenching, heart-breaking sobs.  I was ready to buy a ticket home for the next morning and just give up.  I went up onto the roof and cried.  I came back to my room and cried.  As I lay in bed, crying myself to sleep, I didn’t even know what to pray.  So, I settled on the prayer that my parents would say with me every night when they tucked me in:

“Now I lay me down to sleep,

I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

Guide me safely through the night,

And wake me with the morning light.”

            

            I felt better.  I felt a little connection to home.  I fell asleep.

            When I woke in the morning, life was better.  It always is!  

            On Tuesday morning I was able to meet some friends with truck at Morning Star, and they helped me bring the first load of my stuff back to Notre Maison. I had to put it all in the therapy room, which I wasn’t thrilled about because I really wanted to get settled in my room, but it was better than nothing.  And, at Morning Star I said "Hello" to friends and former colleagues.  They made me feel wanted and missed.  I almost started crying again, but I didn't!

            I did work on Center stuff that afternoon hat needed to get done, and that made me feel good.  Gave me focus and purpose so that I didn’t sit and feel sorry for myself!

            The 15^th is a holiday in Haiti—the Assumption of Mary—so I went to the Center for a bit and dropped of some supplies and looked around.  We have a TON of stuff to do to be ready for school on the 3^rd, but somehow it will get done.  I hope.

            I miss the “easy” life at Morning Star—the electricity 24/7, AC most of the time, strong WiFi so that I can stream Netflix.  But, I don’t miss sitting in my room all the time.  I may not have as many creature comforts at Notre Maison, but I love sitting up on the roof to do my work.  I’m pretty much up there all the time.  I get lots of fresh air, and I don’t feel cooped up like I did at MSCA.

            Thursday I felt very accomplished.  I went to a place called Maxima to order really nice bench/desks for the Center. I then had to go from there to the airport to meet someone who was donating orthotic-type things.  I took them to the Center where I met Debbie and George who were there to introduce me to a young lady they know who is looking for a job.  I always love seeing friends in Haiti, but this time was especially important because they brought me a Diet Coke!  Yes!

            At that point of the week, I was feeling pretty good about being back.  I had my motorcycle, and that was working pretty well.  I was slowly getting all my stuff to Notre Maison (Morning Star had stored some shipped items for me as well).  I discovered that I can still understand/speak 

Creole . . . okay. Thankfully, the despair I felt that first night has not returned.

            At this point, you’re probably wondering about the title of this blog. You know--the whole "panty" thing.  I’m getting to that.

            I wake up Friday morning and get ready to head to Université Quisqueya for the workshop that I signed up for.

            Only, I discover that I have no clean underwear (you discover these things too late when the bulk of your stuff is still packed in boxes in the therapy room). No time to wash a pair and have it dry.

            So, I head out commando!  

            Don’t think anyone at the workshops noticed, but I certainly was aware of the fact.

Medium-sized shirt?

            In spite of the lack of underwear, the seminar went well.  I understand 90% of it (the whole thing was in Haitian Creole), and I could participate and share my ideas.  The seminar was on how to help struggling readers, which helped because I already know a lot about the topic in English, so it was fairly easy to figure stuff out in Creole.  

            I am now in possession of my first seminar certificate, which are highly valued in Haiti as signs of professional development.  I also received a T-shirt as part of my participation practice.  They gave me a medium.  I asked for an XL.  They didn't have that size.  Never did.  They assured  me that a medium would fit.  I walked away thinking there is no way my upper body is fitting into a medium shirt!

            Back to the panties.  

           Now, back in June when I first got home for summer vacation, I purchased 21 pair of new underwear for reasons that make perfect sense when someone else is handwashing your underwear for you.  They weren’t in the suitcases that I brought.  Went to the therapy room.  They weren’t in the packages I had shipped through Morning Star.  I looked through the bins I had packed and left in Haiti—maybe I didn’t take all the underwear home in June.  No luck.

            My only hope was that they had been packed and shipped with the stuff sent to Agape.  Otherwise, the four pair I had were going to get worn out.  Quickly.

            I did hand wash a pair in the sink so that today I was able to wear clean underwear.

            Fortunately, I worked at Agape this morning, so I had the perfect chance to check for underwear.  The boxes were there, but I had no way of getting them home because I was on my motorcycle.  What to do. What to do.

Happy Camper!

            I finally thought “Screw it.”  I took my Swiss army knife and cut open my two boxes.  Found some of the new underwear!  Took a package out and casually walked over to my backpack and slipped it in.  Don’t know whether anyone noticed.  Don’t really care! 

            I have clean underwear!

A New Beginning

            

          Summer vacation is over.  I’m sitting at O’Hare airport waiting for my flight, reflecting on the summer I had.

            I front loaded my first weeks home by running around shopping for Center 

supplies, buying personal items I would need in Haiti, and then shipping it all in time to get on the cargo container being sent by Morning Star Christian Academy. I can’t thank Pastor Jay, Mrs. Linda, and Morning Star in general, enough for their support in my ministry in Haiti. Even though I no longer work at MSCA, they allow me to take advantage of its resources, which allows me to do so much more than I could do on my own. Friendships developed there that will stay with me for a lifetime. 

          A part of that unpacking will also include putting together the Ikea items I bought for my room at the orphanage—love Ikea!  I will have drawers to put together and a clothes hanging rack to assemble.  I also have new sheets and towels—I think both are green with polka dots.  I think I also packed some new clothes for myself. Maybe.  Can’t really remember!

I had a ball shopping for the school supplies that the teachers wanted, and I’m excited to pick up the boxes and see what I sent!  I have always loved (and still do love) office supplies, so going to Office Max and The Scholarship, a teacher store, was no chore!  Seeing all the fun arts and crafts supplies for elementary school teachers almost made me want to be an elementary school teacher.  Almost.

            Once that initial flurry of activity ended, I was able to relax and really enjoy myself.  I spent some time up in Whitewater with family and friends.  I had the privilege of speaking at First English Lutheran Church again and sharing with the congregation about the work being done at the Center.  They continue to walk with me on this journey, and without their support (of all types), so much of what is being done at the Center just wouldn’t happen. I also spent TONS of time with friends in the Geneva area and hung out with my dog Boo as much as I could.  I love that dog to pieces and miss him terribly while I’m gone, but he’s in good hands with Susan.  And, Boo gets to live with his girlfriend Nelle, the cutest little Rat Terrier you will ever see.

          I love going to Whitewater and worshiping at First English Lutheran Church, the church I grew up in and in which I first learned to love the Lord.  I love just as much worshiping at New Hope Lutheran Church in Aurora, IL.  This church is my church home now, and they have walked with me since I first visited Haiti in 2009.  Without their continued love, support, and prayers, I would not be where I am in Haiti.  They, too, deserve a shout out for the work they are doing in Haiti at the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education!

            The best part about being in Whitewater, though, was spending time with family and friends.  At the end of July, I attended my 30^thclass reunion and caught up with some life-long friends.  I didn’t know it was possible to laugh that much!  Seriously, my face hurt from smiling so much, and my stomach ached from all the laughter.  Teachers often told me that they thought the class of ’88 was a special group of people, and being with those friends again reminded me that those teachers were right—the class of ’88 was, and is, a special group of people.

Rafting the Powder River

Look out on the one-lane road
through Rocky Mountain National Park

            One disappointment of the summer occurred early in July.  My four nieces and I planned to fly to Haiti on August 1 so that they could spend time with me there as they did last summer.  Unfortunately, pretty bad civil unrest broke out the weekend of July 6-8, and we decided that it would be best for the girls to forego the trip.  On the upside, however, Grandma and Grandpa stepped in and changed the trip to Colorado!  Thanks to the generosity of my parents, my mom, my four nieces, and I spent an amazing week in the Loveland area of CO.  Oh my gosh, we had fun!  Hiking. Four wheeling. Laughing.  Mountain biking.  Swimming in 59-degree mountain lake water (Okay, that was just Michaela, RebA, and Alyssa.  Sarah and I had the good sense to stay dry).  Whitewater rafting.  Eating great food--steak anyone? I couldn’t have asked for a better time with family.

Go Cubbies!

  It's hard to beat the beauty of Colorado, but it does get better! An amazing friend gave me tickets to see the Cubs play at Wrigley Field!  The seats were awesome—I could’ve talked to Jason Hayward if I had wanted to! The Cubs lost, but Wrigley always delivers.  The Cubs didn’t let me down, though.  They came back Sunday night (7/12/18) to beat the Nationals 4-3.  The ending was every ball player’s dream: bases loaded, two out, bottom of the ninth, down 3-0.  Bote is at the plate and hits a Grand Slam Homerun!  Go Cubs Go!

            And now I’m heading back to Haiti.  To work full time at the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education.  To work at the school that I have dreamed about opening for the past seven years.  When I moved to Haiti two years ago, I wasn’t sure how long I would be in the country or whether the school would ever become a reality.  I still don’t know how long I will be there or how the school will develop. But, I know that God had blessed me by allowing me to follow what I believe is His call for life at this point in time.  I know that He has brought many people together to support me in this work.  And for now, knowing that God’s hand is in all of this is enough.

It's a Wrap

The first year of the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education (HCIE) is in the books!  We did it!  

This dream of mine took hold back in 2012, and since I first started talking about working with Gertrude to open a school for special-needs children, many of you have encouraged me; supported me; prayed for me; and listened while I complained, cried, and vented about the challenges.

The kids love playing with Phonsely

The school year started on Monday, September 3, 2017.  I couldn’t be there that day because I was working at Morning Star Christian Academy on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.  That will be different in the coming school year—I will be present on the first day of school at HCIE because I now work there full time.  That is both an exciting and a scary step for me because it means stepping out even more in faith and relying on God to provide for my every need.  

There have been growing pains this year (and over the past six years), but none have diminished the purpose of the school.  Originally, I planned to open a school just for special-needs children, which I believe is desperately needed in Haiti.  However, when we opened our doors last fall, the school was an inclusive school which means that children with special needs, children with learning disabilities, and children with no known needs all attend school together.  That’s very rare in Haiti.  Yes, the vision changed, but it was a change for the better!

Our first graders

Gertrude and I had planned to start small—begin with kindergarten.  Unfortunately, through some misunderstandings over the summer, students up to 3rd grade were enrolled.  We rolled with it and made it work.  Our goal is to keep growing and begin adding the “extras” that we need to help all of our students: a music teacher so that we can use music as a way to engage all students in lessons; a physical therapist so that we can provide therapy for our students who are wheelchair bound; a life-skills program that includes cooking, laundry, farming, etc.  

Starting the way we did (bigger than anticipated) caused me great stress!  And, at times I wasn’t so nice about it.  Part of the learning process for me has been balancing my American way of thinking with my ingrained sense of planning and organization with Haitian culture.  I am learning which educational things to fight for because I know they are stronger ways of teaching/educating children and what things to let go of simply because of my own preferences.  It’s often a daily battle!  

The amazing HCIE staff

Some of those challenges result from the language barrier.  I don’t know enough Creole yet to clearly share my vision for the school, and I don’t understand Creole well enough to grasp the principals’ vision for the school.  For the most part we’re on the same page, but the lack of good conversational skills on my part means that I miss out on a lot of the brainstorming and dreaming that comes during casual conversation.  Because of that, I often feel left out of the decision-making process; by the time the group sits down to plan, it seems as if the other three have already hashed everything out and I’m left to catch up.

A major growing pain for me has been in the area of leadership.  When it comes to leading, I am much more of an Aaron than a Moses.  I am more comfortable and better skilled at walking alongside  the out-front leader than I am at being the out-front leader.  As an administrator of HCIE, though, I am often called on to be a Moses instead of an Aaron.  I prefer to lead through example rather than words.  Unfortunately, I often don’t have the words in Creole to lead that way even though I am expected to.  I also don’t know whether the “lead by example” method is seen as “real” leadership in Haiti.  If garbage needs to be picked up, I pick it up.  If the front gate needs to opened or closed, I do it.  If I child needs to be fed, I feed her.  I wouldn’t say that those things are frowned upon, but I do sense that hierarchical roles are much more established in Haiti than I am used.  The best leaders I’ve worked with are those who do any job that needs doing regardless of whether it fits into their job description—you just do the work that needs to be done.  So, when I try to lead that way, I don’t know that it is valued.  I will have to work on the Moses-type skills in order to grow into my administrative position.

Jackey and me

The kids.  That’s the area that has been the most awesome for me—and isn’t that what it’s all about, really?  The kids are learning.  They are growing.  Nothing beats having children run up to you to give you hugs and kisses when they see you in the morning.  And, for all of you that know Gus, there is no better sight than having him run up to you in his awkward gait with that huge smile spread across his face.  I got that every Tuesday and Thursday from him when he arrived at school. Pretty cool.  Back to the learning part, though.  We have one girl who is 14 and in 3rd grade for the second time.  She passed this year and can now read!  And, she enjoys reading!  She’ll be in 4th grade next year, and now that we have a better idea of her strengths and weaknesses, I bet she’ll pas 4th grade the first time through.  Another student finally passed 2nd grade (at age 11).  One of our 2nd graders who is 11 developed a strong relationship with her teacher and was able to share that she hesitates to speak up in class because of how Dad treats her at home.  Because she feels she has no voice at home, she feels she has no voice anywhere.  She’s finding her voice which will serve her well in the future.

Learning to do laundry!

I'm learning along with the kids!

So, what’s next?  For me, I quit my paying job at Morning Star Christian Academy so that I can work full time at HCIE.  That means that I had to move all my stuff to Notre Maison because I needed a place to live.  Gertrude has been kind enough to let me rent a room there so that I didn’t have to figure out how to live on my own in Haiti.  Quitting the paying job also means that I will need to rely completely on the support of family, friends, and others who believe in this mission.  That’s a totally scary step for me, but I’m doing it.

Working at HCIE full time means that I MUST improve my language skills so that I can contribute in a meaningful way to the processes that go on at HCIE.  I have knowledge and skills that can be helpful to the teachers and principals; now I need to make sure that I can share that knowledge and those skills.

Alexandre--one of our special-needs students

For the school, we will continue to fundraise to cover costs not taken care of through tuition such as school supplies, teacher in-services, food for snacks, and supplies for the chicken coop and garden.  We will write grants so that we can hire a part-time music teacher.  We will work with universities to create a PT/OT internship program.  

We have big plans for the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education.  With God’s grace and blessing we will continue to grow and serve the children.  If you want to know more about how you can help support us, please feel free to contact me via email at jamieschumacher34@gmail.com or to send me a message via Facebook.  

PS. I knew it had been awhile since I'd blogged anything, but I didn't realize it had been this long!  So sorry--I will do better in the future (I know. . . I've said that before, but this time I mean it!  For real.)

The Best Laid Plans . . .

It seems a bit anti-climactic to write this blog now—three days after my first day at the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education—but Hurricane Irma got in the way.

            Monday, September 4, was the first day of school for Haitian schools.  I couldn’t be present at the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education because I need the paying gig at Morning Star.  However, I was up early and ready to go on Tuesday the 5^th for my first day at the Center.  I arrived at 8:00, thinking I would be the first (as a boss should be), but no—the teachers were already there!  Good for them.

            We have 50 children enrolled now, and I thought I would see little kids running around and playing.  Nope.  I’d say only about 30 kids showed up; not sure whether that was due to not having uniforms ready or what, but we certainly did not have full house.  And, most of the pre-school kids were crying.  One poor little cried all day, except when she was eating her snack of cold French fries and a cold hot dog (more on snacks later!).  Pretty much the only kids who played were the kids from Notre Maison, and that was because they’d been to the Center for summer camp and because they know each other.

            I took a walk into the station room thinking kids might be playing with some of the toys.  Nope.  More crying kids and no one sure what to do.  Some of the kids had grabbed a MatchBox car or two, but they weren’t playing with them; they holding onto them as if they were life lines!  Shoulda heard the wailing when we had to take the cars away and go outside for the raising of the flag and the singing of the national anthem (Monter le Drapeau). 

Kindergarten class

            I have never worked with little kids, but I wasn’t totally surprised by the crying.  I was more surprised by how long they could cry and easily it was to get them started again once they had stopped!

Mixed grade room

            I had visions of how the school day would go, and pretty much none of it happened! The schedule that Gertrude and I put together and that the teachers modified so did not work!  Academic classes (some) were too short.  Rest time was too long.  Somehow kids never got outside to play.  The station room wasn’t used at all.  Snacks were eaten in the classrooms, not the cafeteria.  We did not have enough water.  The multi-grade level room seemed haphazard because neither of the administrators were sure what their responsibilities were.  They’d been told that they would be teaching those kids, but nothing had been planned out for sure. 

            So many logistical things were overlooked in our planning.  Like, no one told the teachers that we had purchased a water pitcher for each room so that during snack the aide could go fill up the pitcher and bring water back.  We did not designate which bathroom was for boys and which for girls (I still haven’t purchased the signs, but we could have least told the teachers!).  We didn’t not figure on how disruptive it would be for adults to be going through the pre-K room to get to the storage rooms.  I swear, every time I went through the room, another kid would start crying (probably just after the teachers had gotten her settled down!). 

Add caption

            We—Gertrude, the other administrators, and I—failed to think of writing up some rules and regulations for the kids to follow.  Like, you don’t go into another classroom unless the teacher has asked you to.  You don’t run in the hallway.  You don’t enter the office area.  You don’t throw rocks. You don’t walk around

            I know that lots of kids in Haiti don’t get proper nutrition, so I wanted to provide a healthy daily snack for the kids.  A couple of snags with that plan—no one told me that parents would send a snack with the kids; I did not realize that the school does not have a refrigerator to keep anything cold; the kitchen does not have shelves on which to put cups, plates, utensils, etc.  And, everything needs to be locked up so that it isn’t stolen (the peanut butter and crackers are locked in a storage room nowhere near the kitchen, we have but 1-2 butter knives, and the Notre Maison kids who are expecting the snack are spread out over four different classrooms).  Wouldn’t it make sense to keep the food in the kitchen where it needs to be prepared?  Wouldn’t it make more sense to bring the kids to the cafeteria where the food is instead of delivering the food to them? 

            So, the year has not started as I thought it would, but that’s okay!  It’s started.  Nothing that starts for the first time looks like it does on paper, and there are always unforeseen needs/glitches.  And, Hurricane Irma certainly affected the start of the year—we only had two days before we had to cancel school because of the weather!  

So Much

           

 Well, tomorrow’s it—the First Day of School!

 Sweetness!

Gertrude and our cart of supplies

            The teachers have been hard at work the last week making plans and decorating their rooms.  Gertrude and I have been all over the place getting the supplies the teachers need and all the other stuff that goes with opening a school—buying garbage cans, brooms, toilet paper, dish clothes for the kitchen, dusters, toilet bowl scrubbers, toilet bowl cleaner, etc.!  Who’da thunk!

            I have spent countless hours organizing materials, moving furniture, making lists of needed repairs, setting up the room that will be used for station work.  That room is “ready,” but I’m not sure the teachers know exactly what to do with it.  I think the idea of stations and kids doing separate things is totally foreign to them (no pun intended!).  I think a big part of my job will be showing them how to use stations to instruct kids, to let the kids explore on their own, to allow for noise.  I think the noise will be an issue—my impression is that Haitian schools are very quiet except when the class is responding chorally.  Otherwise, the kids are expected to be quiet, but I don’t know that that’s because teachers believe it’s best.  I think it’s because any noise is seen as lack of teaching skill.  Maybe?  I don’t know for sure—I’ll find out in the coming weeks!

Kindergarten teacher and aide

            The things I’ve learned . . . that list could go on forever! But, I’ll keep it short for ya!

Pre-school teacher and 

1.      I continually have to check (mostly) my American culture at the door.  I say “mostly” because there are many things that American education does better than Haiti.  And, I need to push those educational practices that I know are good for children.  However, I need to see what these teachers do before I force my ideas on them.

2.     American school leadership looks very different from that in Haiti (or, at least with the leadership that I’m working with).  I arranged the tables and chairs in the rooms in pods, and our financial secretary looked uncomfortable with what I had done.  He asked whether I planned to leave them like that, and I explained that I just put them that way and that the teachers could arrange the room any way they wanted.  That idea took him by surprise.  He had the same response when he was telling some teachers where he thought the tables should go in the pre-school.  I interrupted and said that the teachers would decide that.  He again looked surprised. 

One of our stations--just play!

I don’t know whether all school directors micro-manage like that, whether they see that as part of their responsibilities, but I plan to let teachers have more decision-making freedom in their own rooms. 

3.     I really need to work on my language skills!  I want to be able to be an equal partner in the professional discussions, and I can’t do that without speaking the language.  I do not want to be dependent on a translator!

Special-needs teachers

4.     I can’t do this alone.  I have a vision for what the Haiti Center for Inclusive Education can and should be.  Sharing that vision with others is hard because of language, distance, and multiple voices.  This isn’t my school (no matter how much I want it to be!), it is our school: the kids’, the teachers’, Gertrude’s, the Board of Director’s, God’s. 

5.     I’m not doing this alone!  The support from churches, friends, family, strangers—literally people all over the world—is making this happen.  Not me.  Note to self: check the ego at the door!  Totally.

Our "station" room

6.     Haitian offices/school rooms don’t come with shelving.  Or much of any storage.  I’m starting to see why so much is stored on the floor or in piles on desks.  When buildings are constructed, there seems to be no thought to shelving or storage space or placing outlets in accessible spots.  It’s been driving me nuts, but Gertrude’s creativity is wearing off on me, and I’m slowing finding ways to “store” items and still keep it easy to get at them.

I’ve probably forgotten about a bazillion other things that I’ve learned.  As they come back to me, I will make sure to post some of them because most of what I’m learning is keeping me humble.

Pre-school tables

      I, of course, have been busy taking pictures as teachers prepared and the school slowly transformed from empty rooms to school.  Some of them are shared here.  I can’t be at the first day of school tomorrow—that darn paying job has to take precedence!—but I will be there Tuesday getting as many shots as I can.  Look for them soon!